On creative deflowering

I’m sixteen and I kind of want to lose my virginity just to get it over with. I don’t feel pressured to lose it, but I just want to… bad idea?

Nope, not a bad idea. You only get one first time, though. Instead of just getting it over with, I suggest you get creative.

Have you ever considered auctioning off your virginity for charity?

Seriously, why not? I’m sure there are tons of wealthy perverts with a virgin fetish who’d pay big bucks to pop your teenage cherry for charity. No joke.

Start a website called Put that shit on eBay. Open the bidding at $100,000.

Don’t worry, it’s not prostitution if the guy writes a check directly to a nonprofit of your choosing. Just double-check that the age of consent in your neighborhood is sixteen, and it’s all perfectly legal.

In a world that’s running out of original ways to generate fifteen minutes of fame, I guarantee this would start a shit storm of publicity. Not only is this clever and controversial, but you’d piss off all the right people and raise some major awareness for a worthy cause.

You’d be making the world a better place with your pussy. How many of us ever get to do that?


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