Fun-Sized Advice

On fun-sized advice

Why do cops get away with murdering people?
Because the system too easily allows police to justify use of deadly force.


Do you ever feel like an anarchist?

No. I’m an anti-authoritarian, not an anarchist. My problem isn’t with systems of government per se, but rather with the systemic violence inherent to concentrations
of power.


Why do men always want to fold me into a pretzel during sex?

Porn.


I just broke up with my boyfriend and it was seriously the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my life. Does that make me soft?

You’re soft now, but doing hard things is what hardens you.


How fucked up is it that we can’t talk about transgenderism as a mental illness?

Your world view is the mental illness.


Is it possible to just avoid my friend’s shitty husband until they inevitably get a divorce?

Yes. I do it all the time.


Is it shallow to leave an otherwise good relationship because the sex isn’t good?

Maybe. It depends on things like your age and the depth of the relationship. Perhaps spend some time and effort examining *why* the sex isn’t good. If it’s just a lack of communication about personal preferences, things might improve with a little work. If it’s a fundamental lack of sexual chemistry, ending the relationship certainly makes more sense.


Why doesn’t it feel like he loves me?

I can’t tell you why, although it’s probably because he doesn’t. Even if he does, it certainly isn’t in a manner that satisfies your basic emotional needs, and that’s not the kind if thing that changes on its own.


You have the rhetoric of someone who’s been to rehab. Right or wrong?

The rhetoric of rehab entered the popular lexicon well over a decade ago. (And no, I haven’t been to rehab.)


so are you totally opposed to the idea of long-term romantic relationships or what

No. I prefer long-term romantic relationships. I’m just opposed to staying in unhealthy or imbalanced ones.


Have you changed much since your mid-20s?

I’ve slowed down quite a bit. I have fewer acquaintances and closer friends. I’m weirder, but I make more sense. My hair is different.

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