On fun-sized advice

Do beautiful people really have more fun?
No. It just seems that way because they look better while they’re having it.

I’m an aspiring writer, but I can’t find the words to tell someone something they said is still hurting me. Does that say more about what a shitty writer I am or is it a sign that I need to let it go?
The courage you need to stand up for yourself in the face of someone hurting you is the same courage you need to stop using the word “aspiring.”

I wrote “Hypocrites” on the wall of a church. I did it out of blacked out anger. They get me angry. It’s the church my mom goes to. What are your thoughts on my behavior?
I think your use of the phrase “I did it out of blacked out anger” is a massive red flag. I think you’re a childish and potentially dangerous little shit, and I hope you don’t have access to a gun.

I am 28 and single. I “get” a lot of guys, but can’t hold any down. Men just will not commit to me. I am at the point where I want a boyfriend. How do I lock a man down?
Goddamn, bitch. How about you start by using some imagery that doesn’t sound like you’re trying to trick some dude into putting on leg irons. How is a guy supposed to believe that committing to you isn’t some kind of a prison sentence when clearly that’s what you think it is too?

What do you think of the social etiquette concerning people not being able to tell other people that their horrible children are being horrible in public, or that they have bad parenting skills?
I don’t know what social etiquette you’re talking about. I’ll look a parent right in the eye and tell them to shut their fucking kids up. Then again, I’m an asshole.

When it’s good it’s great. Never for long though. We fight constantly and I know it won’t last because we are toxic for each other, but I’m too chicken to end it. Just convince me already.
If you know it won’t last, then you’ve already made your decision. Quit delaying the inevitable. If you end it now, you might still have a chance at remembering him fondly. That’s worth more than grinding through another few months until you both hate each other.

What’s your favorite piece of classical music? I’m trying to expand my horizons.
Do you mean classical music or orchestral music? Because my favorite classical piece is probably Bach’s Cello Suite No. 1*. If you’re just talking about orchestral music, I’m a huge fan of Max Richter. (His albums infra and Memoryhouse are fucking incredible.)

* Fucking hell, people. Please stop writing in to inform me that Bach’s music is Baroque. All music from the common practice period is colloquially referred to as classical music, and you damn well know that.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *