Advice

On sounding like an elite liberal

How do you know so much about what happens after death?  You sound like an elite liberal who knows everything whether they do or not.

Take a deep breath. Relax. This is not a fight. I am not a threat to you.

I get it. You’re terrified of death, and like most people, you have a core belief system of antiquated myths you’ve carried with you your entire life as a defense mechanism against that final and horrifying inevitability.

It’s perfectly understandable, as is your reaction to someone like me.

My world view is different than yours. You want to stick me in a little box labeled “wrong,” and so you call me “an elite liberal,” because that’s what Fox News has trained you to call me.

It doesn’t matter whether I’m elite or liberal. That label doesn’t have any actual meaning to you. It’s just a thought terminating cliché that you use to summarily dismiss anything that might threaten your belief system.

So once again, let me be clear. I am not a threat to you. I don’t know any more about what happens after death than you do. That would be impossible.

There’s no need to worry, because you are absolutely, positively, without-a-doubt convinced that there is a god in a heaven where you will spend an everlasting life, right?

Of course, you’re sure of it. You have to be sure of it. Otherwise, your whole identity would be shattered, and that’s a fate worse than death.

So take another deep breath. Relax. I promise, by the time you start your work week, those little pangs of existential angst you felt while reading my column will have faded away.

Because this is not a fight, and I am not a threat to you.

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