I fucking hate my roommate. I fucked her twice. She was annoying before I fucked her. But now, she is the epoch of annoying. Shes younger (21), not particularly mature, attention seeking, and trashy as a tractor tire. When she speaks my skin crawls. This is a whole other universe of confronting ‘the real’. I’m not exclusive in this assessment either, our other roommate agrees. Shes unbearable. Now, however, because of some weak ass lease shit, we can’t kick her out. My strategy of headphones and attention denial isn’t helping me deal. I’m an asshole, and okay with it; it’s my fucking identity. I need a new strategy to get through the next few months.
Slow down there, charm school. Maybe your identity as a self proclaimed asshole isn’t the way to go. Sure, you hate yourself for a lot of reasons, but how about acting like a compassionate human being for once?
I get it. You stuck your dick in an unbearable tractor tire. Twice. It’s actually a pretty transparent move, dude. Once you fucked her, you started projecting all of your self hatred onto this poor girl. She’s your cum dumpster and emotional scapegoat all in one.
Listen, she’s not the one making your skin crawl. You are. It’s time for you to stop feeling so much hate, and a strategy of headphones will never help you deal. It’ll only distract you from the consequences of your shitty decisions.
Your new strategy should be to recognize that your own self loathing is the root cause of your situation. Your new strategy should be to treat yourself and others with some fucking respect. Your new strategy should be to realize that there’s nothing else to this life but the time we spend loving other people.
Go ahead, spend the next few months being kind, thoughtful, and generous. See if your whole world doesn’t change.