On becoming swingers.

My boyfriend and I have been together since I was 19. I’m now 24 and feel that I have missed out on my single life. I’ve only been with him sexually and also feel that I have missed out on sexual opportunities. When I first starting feeling this way I also felt very guilty since my boyfriend has been nothing less of great to me. There is not a single thing to make me want to leave him except for this annoying feeling that I’ve been missing out. When I started to talk to my friends about this issue my crazy single friends said JOIN US you’re young and you shouldn’t be tied down. My friends in relationships said I’d never find another guy like my boyfriend. I’ve told my boyfriend everything and now he feels guilty for me never having my young and crazy single stage in life. He offered for me to have a one night stand, to go on break to figure things out or to date another guy at the same time. He said all he wants is my happiness and if that means to breakup so I can go wild and free, so be it. After he did all that I felt even worse because he was making such an effort to try to help me. I don’t know what to do but I feel its a lose-lose situation. Either I stay with him and always feel I missed out or I go single and loose probably the boyfriend I’ll ever have.

I just wanted to add something on my previous question on whether or not to go for the single life or to stay with my boyfriend. I’m a horny kinky bitch. My boyfriend is awesome in bed, but since I’ve never been with anyone else I really can’t compare. But I always fantasize over other guys, and what they would do, and how they would have sex. I’m also curious about being with a woman. And from reading all of your blogs, I can say I’m truly jealous of your lifestyle. I used to picture myself as a wild thing, untamed, never falling in love and never dealing with the “normal” part of life. I just don’t know how I got here. Help.

Lose-lose? Fuck that. Turn this into a win-win.

Where is it written that you can’t have the best of both worlds? Become swingers. Fuck other people together. Your boyfriend seems like he can handle it, and clearly you need it.

You really can have it both ways. I promise. Not only can it work, but it can be amazing. You can strengthen your relationship at the same time you’re indulging in all your sexual fantasies.

Talk it over with your man. Do some research together. If you need a good starting point, I recommend creating a couple’s profile on It’s the only social networking site for swingers that is straight-up, no bullshit. The people on it are real, and they’re very helpful when it comes to easing newbies in to the lifestyle.

Let me know how it goes.


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