Fun-Sized Advice

On fun sized advice

Does everyone look the same in LA?
Yes. Everyone. We are all just David Bowie with different hair.

I’m an intelligent 20 year old girl who is desperately trying to mature and do some actual growing up. Any advice?
Quit desperately trying to mature and just mature. In fact, let’s see if you can give up using all the words that end in -ly.

How can I make my blog more amazing, like yours, but without all the swearing?
Start by reevaluating your notion of profanity.

Coke or diet coke?
Yeah. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if all this turned out to be underground marketing for the coca-cola corporation? Ew, just typing that gave me the shivers.

Don’t you feel guilty about the oil related wars that your Government is and will be fighting to maintain your lifestyle?
Fuck no. There’s a big difference between my government and my country, and it takes more than a passive-aggressive question to elicit a shame response in someone like me.

If you were to make a mix CD/tape for your primary love interest, what would be your top ten choices for songs?
Dude, you might as well ask for pics of me blowing him. That shit’s personal.

Is Sasha Grey a feminist?
I wouldn’t presume to speak for her, but if Sasha feels strongly either way about the movement, she’s earned the soapbox upon which she can stand.

I don’t want to date him, but I don’t want him to date anyone else. Thoughts?
Um, sucks to be you? Did you remember to take your pills? Put down the knife? I dunno, take your pick.

Who the hell am I? And where the fuck am I going?
Nobody. Nowhere. Fuck it. Have a sandwich.

I think I just made friends with the New Zealander version of you… she recently commented that a hipster bartender looked like he had escaped Auschwitz and gone to fashion school. Gold!
Tell that cracked out kiwi that what’s good enough for the von Furstenbergs is good enough for your hipster bartender. Shots!

Do you believe that we are capable of being happy for longer than a few moments?
Oh, what’s really going to bake your noodle later on is, would you still have asked this question if you knew there was no other moment than the present?


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