Fun-Sized Advice

On fun-sized advice

If I don’t have a concrete reason for not wanting to keep seeing a guy, is it okay to break it off? Or should I stick it out and see if I start feeling butterflies?
To your first question, you don’t need a concrete reason. It’s perfectly okay to break it off. To your second question, it’s also fine if you want to stick it out. Sometimes a slow burn is nice. You’ll know soon enough one way or the other.

I threw a party, and everyone showed up late. It bothered me more than it should have. I took it personally, which I see is the mistake. That they showed up at all is really is all that matters in the end. But it kind of brought me down the whole night. So how do I not take this shit personally?
Yes, one of your mistakes was taking it personally. A slightly larger mistake in this instance was not knowing ahead of time that everyone always shows up late to a party. That’s how it works. As the host, you get to pick a time when you’re ready to receive guests, but don’t ever confuse that with the time the party starts. They aren’t at all the same thing.

What’s wrong with a woman changing her last name? It’s just swapping out her fathers name for her husbands, and if she wants to, more power to her. Or does your feminism not give women the space to make their own choices?
Actually, my feminism gives women (and men) greater space to make more choices. For instance, what’s wrong with a man changing his last name? If he wants to take on his wife’s name, more power to him. Or is your world view so blinded by the patriarchy that you can’t see how inherently limiting it is to everyone’s choices?

I can only hook up with guys after I’ve had a couple of drinks. Otherwise I am way too anxious. What’s up with that?
Um, yeah. Alcohol lowers your inhibitions. That’s kind of the point. The anxiety you feel while sober is also perfectly normal. My concern is your use of the word “only.” Be careful with that. It could lead to problems.

You’ve just become friends with a girl. Said girl has a boyfriend. She also knows that you like girls. She sends you a picture of her pussy, no caption included. What the fuck do you do?
Tell her she has a nice pussy.

I didn’t know sex could destroy a couch so mercilessly. Can’t get the fucking lady stain out. Tips?
Flip the cushion.

Will you please weigh in on this whole standoff situation in Oregon?
Bunch of assholes. Next.

I live in LA and can’t help but feel a little abandoned! Not totally seriously. . . but your posts about the city always really resonated with me, and made me feel at home. Is there hope for those of us still here? I don’t want to fall out of love with this place, not ever.
I don’t want to fall out of love with LA either. That’s why I left.

This should be simple but I still can’t figure it out: what’s the difference between being kind and being submissive.
Being submissive is about power. The selflessness of kindness has nothing to do with power. You’re confusing submissiveness¬†with selflessness.

Is the human condition flawed?


14 thoughts on “On fun-sized advice

  1. notmyname says:

    Through soak with windex and absorb (not wipe) up with paper towel.
    That is, if you haven’t tried Ivory bar soap and cold water.

  2. Daffodil says:

    Folex is my go-to stain remover. That stuff is pretty close to miraculous. Since the stain came from biological material something enzyme-based might be worth a try too.

    If you can get the cover off the cushion, do. It’ll make it 100x easier to clean.

  3. Nina says:

    Try an upholstery cleaner from a car supply/accessory store. I had excellent results from one in a tall red can that had a scrubbing brush built into the top. It may have been Resolve.

  4. Cleo says:

    Ugh, you blow (see also: open) my mind so often (the kindness one got me this time). As long as you’ll be writing, I’ll be reading.

  5. Perspectivator says:

    I kept hearing, “Actually it’s about ethics in federal land management.”
    Now I’m hearing that nobody there wants those guys hanging out.
    When they talk about giving land back to the locals, they sure as fuck don’t mean the American Indians!

    Fuck those guys and send em a bag of dicks.

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