Fun-Sized Advice

On fun-sized advice

are politics + economics just our egos fighting each other over who is right?
Nope. Politics and economics are just our species fighting over who gets the limited resources.

I have an opportunity to work in New York doing what I love. I currently live and work in Miami, where I’ve spent all my 25 years. I’ve been pushing to leave, but now when I have the chance, I’m terrified. I feel like I’m at a standstill.
Go. Just do it. You’re ready. It’s the perfect time, and being terrified is half the fun.

You answered a question I wrote a while back about cocktails, and while I still love them, my drink of choice is now Scotch. Should I be concerned that my tastes are so easily influenced?
Is your drink of choice now Scotch because I led you to the simple discovery that whiskey is fucking delicious, or did you stop drinking cocktails because I said that nine times out of ten they’re too sweet for my taste? If it’s the former, you’re fine. If it’s the latter, you should be concerned about how easily you’re influenced.

“I need to be loved to feel worthwhile.” This is the answer that came up when I asked myself in half sleep why I would feel depressed if I saw no friends this week-end, because I don’t have real friends in this town I have lived in for more than three years. Is this fucked up?
It’s not fucked up if you can shorten your phrase to simply, “I need to be loved.” We all need to be loved, but feeling worthwhile can’t ever depend on someone else’s love or approval. That’s super unhealthy. It’s the primary ingredient in every enmeshed¬†and codependent relationship.

I wish I could have told you everything, so you could have warned me.
It wouldn’t have mattered. The person you were then wouldn’t have recognized the warning. Some shit you just gotta learn the hard way.

My mom found my copy of The God Delusion. She cried.
Good.

This is kinda random and really nitpicky, but why do some of your @ replies on Twitter begin with a period before the user’s Twitter handle? It’s just something that I’ve noticed over the years.
That’s a thing people do if they want an @ reply to show up on their main feed like a regular tweet. It’s the equivalent of inviting everyone in the room to listen in on your conversation.

You’re definitely looking for deep connection. Is it because you moved to a new place? When I moved across the country I was super desperate for connection.
The exact opposite, actually. I moved to a new place because I was looking for a deep connection.

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2 thoughts on “On fun-sized advice

  1. Chi says:

    Miami looking to move to NYC:

    Make the move like Coke said. At the same time, understand that it will be hard. It will be a whole different ball game than what you’re used to.
    Money is the biggest issue when considering moving to NYC. I’d look at what you’re being paid. To afford a decent life here, you need at least 60k. You can make it work on less than that: roommates, living in Queens or further inside Brooklyn than Manhattan(if you want to live alone). Stay away from Staten Island because transportation is limited unless you have a car. As a result, housing is cheaper there.
    Keep in mind: housing is insanely expensive here, it’s very crowded, people have no time for BS, it’s hectic and fast paced. Also, learn the subway before you get up here. Trust me, it will save yoj a lot of stress. Check out mta.info for maps. Also, stay away from Uber unless you can find a driver you develop a rapport with and can just call them instead.

    Moved from Georgia, from a town of 30,000 people to NY in the middle of winter. Had a rough two months and wanted to go home every week. 2 yrs later, I can’t imagine leaving. So, welcome to NYC in advance. The hardships and craziness are worth the rewards. You’d like it here.

  2. MIA2NYC says:

    Hi CHI,

    Thank you for the advice. I really appreciate you taking the time to write that for me. That’s a very brave move! It’s comforting to know that 2 years later you’re settled into that fast-paced life. Both yours and Coke’s advice are comforting. I was up there for the month of January working temporarily, and I couldn’t help but feel that “rough” month you were referring to. They asked to hire me on my last day, and that’s where the anxiety started kicking in. I think it’s time to just pack it up here and get out there. I’ll be looking into those boroughs you suggested! Thank you again. If you have any more advice, it’s absolutely welcomed!

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