Why is sex with older men so hot?
Because the shift in power dynamics amplifies the experience.
How do you approach a work crush?
From behind with a net.
Should I shave my head?
If you feel that’s what you need to move on, then sure. Go ahead. Just be self-aware enough to know why you’re doing it.
Am I allowed to check up on a dude I dumped yesterday after we had dated for a month. He was really torn by the situation and I got worried (tears and all). Is a “how are you text?” wrong to send? I am concerned.
Unless your concern is one of safety that rises to a level that would necessitate calling 911, leave him the fuck alone. You dumped him. Have the strength of character to let him stay dumped. It’s not fair for you to give him glimmers of false hope just to make yourself feel better.
After a long night of sex and snorting cocaine off his massive dick, he looked at me squarely and said, “I think I’m falling in love with you.” I’ve heard some coke talk in my time, but this line was a killer. Is this blow talk or real talk?
If there was visible sunlight in the room at the time he said it, it was probably real talk. If the shades were drawn or it was still dark outside, it was probably coke talk.
What font are you? What font am I?
At the moment, I’m feeling a little Baskerville Roman, which means you’re Baskerville Bold Italics.
i’ve always imagined you to look like michelle pfeiffer circa scarface/batman returns. like, that’s the image i have of you in my head. if ever a coquette biopic happens, she should play you.
Are you unfamiliar with the human aging process? Michelle Pfeiffer is gorgeous, but she is older than my mother.
Sorry the sell-out comments are getting under your skin. People will buy your book. You are fun to read. The promotion is getting annoying though.
I don’t care. I’m super excited about my book, and no one’s cynicism is gonna get in the way of my fun. I’ll promote it all I want, and you can just soak in it until your fingers get all pruney.
Would you be mad if I waited until the paperback comes out? :/
I won’t be mad, but just so you know, you won’t be able to buy the paperback as cheaply as you can pre-order the hardcover today.
I wish you would blog about your life more.
Okay. That dude from my pros and cons list is in LA on business. The other day he got into an UberPool with one of my very best girlfriends from back in the day. He was like “I’m from such-and-such city” and she was like “Oh, do you know so-and-so” and he was like “Holy shit, yes, we’re fucking” and they ended up talking about me for the whole ride. They both texted me as soon as they got dropped off, and this world is too fucking small for words.