Fun-Sized Advice

On fun-sized advice

After three years of working a thankless admin position, I was unfairly reprimanded at work. I’ve put up with so much fucking shit, but now I’m just demotivated. I’ve always wanted to quit, but they won’t even let me do that. How do I keep going?
Demand respect. Stop putting up with so much fucking shit. Start looking for other work. Convince your co-workers to unionize. Frame your boss for murder. Burn down the building. Lead an armed insurrection against your capitalist overlords. Go do something with your life.

He wants to be more than friends. I told him politely I wasn’t interested in more and he understood and accepted… But then a couple of days later he asked me if our 20-year age difference was a factor (I’m 40. He’s 60). It is, in part, but I can’t say that, can I?
Of course you can say that.

Does life require purpose and meaning to be fulfilling?
Fulfillment doesn’t really exist as an idea without some concept of purpose or meaning.

Why do I sleep with every single one of my friends?
Because you’re shit at maintaining boundaries.

Being around republicans is bad for your soul and I don’t recommend it.
Thanks for the tip.

Does life get better or worse as you age?

I don’t know what an evergreen tweet is. My friends talk about it and I just nod. I’m exhausted. What’s happening to me?
Any type of media referred to as “evergreen” means that it continues to remain relevant and/or doesn’t lose meaning despite the passing of time. Also, you should probably start taking naps. Naps are awesome.

First proper, long-term relationship. I’ve started recognizing some toxic behaviours in myself (stemming from jealousy and insecurity, most often). I don’t want to be like that. Now what?
Go a level deeper than the jealousy and insecurity. Find out where those two emotions are rooted. Separate rational thinking from irrational thinking, and do the hard work it takes to start choosing healthier behaviors.

How can you tell the difference between inner peace and numbness?
Numbness is feeling nothing. Inner peace is being nothing.

What do you do when you get sad?
I eat like shit and forget to shower.

Sorry if this has been asked before, or if it comes off creepy. I’m genuinely just curious. Has anyone ever correctly guessed your identity before? And if so, have you told them they were right?
Yes. I had a colleague whose girlfriend straight up asked me if I was coketalk once while we were all out having dinner. Apparently, she had been reading my shit since her high-school tumblr days and knew enough about my life to call me out. I flatly denied it.


18 thoughts on “On fun-sized advice

  1. AB says:

    Oh that first response hits the spot. I have so many colleagues that coast on their straight white male privilege and dump their bullshit on others. Completely useless.

    • Gunk says:

      Lol @ coasting on ‘straight white male privelage’. Dude. As a “successful” straight white male who worked his ass off I can’t help but grin at this shit. People like you (insert the obvious and probably true examples here) are awesome. Stay steady procrastinating while crying hard and often, fellow human.

  2. Sel says:

    #1: They won’t “let” you quit? Hand them a resignation letter, say “I quit,” walk out the goddamn door, and don’t go back. That’s legitimately all it takes.

    • Q says:

      I thought the same thing. Fuck you mean? I’ve known so many people who think they’re above menial work, so they do a shit job at their shit job, yet never attempt to find work they believe is suited for them, and end up developing some weird victim complex around it. I’d be willing to bet the reprimand was deserved.

  3. Silvia says:

    “How can you tell the difference between inner peace and numbness?
    Numbness is feeling nothing. Inner peace is being nothing.”

    Ok, I am gonna go and think long and hard about this.

  4. Cheese says:

    Why did all the comments assume the first poster is a white male? Genuine question. I ask because when i read I assumed they were a white female. In offices where I worked, most thankless admin jobs were done by women.

    Also, if you’re reading, what do you mean they won’t let you quit?

    • Chris says:

      OP means that he/she is a pushover and goes with the flow that provides least resistance. Right now, the job is painful enough to complain about, but not enough to do something about.

  5. Chris says:

    “I’ve always wanted to quit, but they won’t even let me….”

    Stop being so lame and weak. 3 years at a job? Really? The only job I kept that long was the military, and it was because I’d go to jail for leaving early. Aren’t you embarrassed to live like this? Are they paying you more than you’re worth? Do they let you work from home so you can be there for your kids? Is the health insurance amazing and you have a spouse with terminal cancer that’s actually reversing? If no, then stop this.

    Now, it’s not fair for me to be a dick without offering solutions.

    (1) Get other sources (plural) of income. 1 source being 100% of your income is very dangerous. Last Spring, I was teaching adjunct at 2 colleges. At one, the boss was a nightmare, so I resigned. I didn’t give up teaching; I gave up that terrible environment.

    (2) Say “no.” No is a full sentence, but you can also use people’s rank against each other.
    Ex: “I can’t get to that, Big Boss. Little Boss has me stacking files. He said it’s really important.”
    “Sorry, SalesFucker, I’m on the XYZ Project right now.”
    “Going to lunch, but when I get back I’ll add it to my list.”
    “Going to donate blood.” Then, stay out the rest of the day. You’ve earned it.

    (3) Fill out an application for another company right now. Trust me, it’s nice.

    (4) If you can sell, get licensed in something, such as insurance, real estate, etc. If you can write, hook up with companies that connect people to editing and writing gigs (for pay only).

  6. Chris says:

    20-year age difference Q:

    Would he be open to an 80-yo lover? He’s only 3/4 her age compared to the 2/3 you are to his, so what’s the problem?

    If he persists, you can also cite very reasonable sentiments like, ‘you’re closer to my dad’s age than mine.’ However, you can also say that you don’t want a face full of gray, Vietnam-era pubes, nor do you want to be French-tickled by a tongue that may or may not have had the very first Pringle (came out in the 60’s).

    • Chris says:

      It starts with making the decision to say no at that certain point, and then holding firm.

      The boundary crossers won’t be happy. They will try to make you feel bad for having a standard for yourself.

      There is a book called “Boundaries,” by Dr. Henry Cloud.

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