Fun-Sized Advice

On fun sized advice

why do you like drummers?
They know how to fuck.

How can I stop defining myself by who I’m dating and instead find self worth through my career?
You’re wrong twice, babe.

i wish there was a like button for your posts. some of them are pure genius.
You see the little star at the end of every post with the words SHARE THIS next to it? Click that shit.

Journalism major and English minor or English major and Journalism minor? I’m aspiring to be a Journalist. Which would be more beneficial?
It doesn’t matter. No one will ever give a fuck about your major. Go with whichever department has a better reputation, and just be an excellent writer.

How do I suggest Viagra to my husband without crushing his ego?
Lady, if he still wanted to fuck you, you wouldn’t have to suggest it.

The Rapture is tomorrow! So they say. In honor of the event: What’s your favorite sin?
Blasphemy every day of the week and apostasy on Sundays.

when should you start fucking someone else after a relationship ends?
Whenever you want, but remember, a break-up isn’t the same thing as the end of a relationship.

i want to get a tattoo on my inner lip. i was thinking of the word ‘vice’ or ‘wonderlust’ … help a bitch out and give me something ballsy & badass.
Wonderlust? Ugh. If you’re gonna do something that stupid, at least be funny. Get “Slot B” tattooed on your inner lip, and then go around offering blowjobs to any guy with “Tab A” tattooed on his dick.

Your feelings on anal? The man-friend is asking for it, and I’m open to it, just not sure what to expect.
Expect a cock up your ass.


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