On getting unstuck.

I’m 41 and still stuck in a depression from a relationship that ended badly twenty years ago. I rarely get involved with people, and don’t even remember the last time I had sex. I feel stuck. Do you have any advice to unstick me?

Twenty years? Are you kidding me? Come on, now. Andy Dufresne didn’t spend that much time in Shawshank.

Whatever prison you think you’re trapped in doesn’t actually exist. That’s the good news. The bad news is you might still have to crawl through a river of shit before coming out clean on the other side.

You suffer from depression. Fine. Whatever. That doesn’t give you license to pin it on the twenty year old version of yourself. Just because you’re fixated on some bullshit that happened in the early nineties, that doesn’t mean it’s the ultimate cause of any present day chemical imbalance.

If you’re clinically depressed, deal with it. Find a shrink and get some meds. Do the fucking work. Heal. On the other hand, if you’re just bummed out and full of excuses, then get over it already.

Either way, get your shit together. You’re capable of it.


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