first of all, i love this blog. you are absolutely the slap in the face that everyone needs, and i mean that in the best possible way. on that note, slap me in the face. i have a very frustrating tendency to write men off for no specific reason. i enjoy the chase, but once they start actually paying attention to me i get freaked out. they say nice things and i don’t smile, i roll my eyes. they want to see me and i don’t reciprocate, i’m “being smothered”. etc. etc. i know it’s not normal, and i’m aware that i’m doing it, but i can’t seem to stop. it’s cost me a couple of potentially-great relationships. i’m trying to just suck it up and get over it, but i feel like i always look for (and manage to find) something that will talk me out of being with basically anyone. any words of advice?
Nope. You’re fucked.
You’ve got Prince Charming disease. It’s a combination of attention deficit disorder, low grade narcissism, a youthful expectation of romantic perfection, and a healthy dose of self-esteem issues on your part.
I can’t talk you out of this kind of immaturity. You’ve got to battle this one on your own. The good news is that at least you’re self aware. That’s the first step.
Next, you need to realize in your heart of hearts that you are worthy of actual love. That will help dampen the fight-or-flight response that kicks in when a man shows you genuine affection.
Finally, you need to plow through enough guys to realize that they’re all basically the same. That way, when you find a good one, not only will you be able to spot him, but you’ll also be comfortable in the knowledge that nothing better is waiting around the corner on a white horse.
Consider yourself slapped.
Best of luck.