Please fucking help. Watching Sarah Palin endorse Trump is like tripping balls on acid and looking into a refrigerator of insanity and not being able to decide what fire to eat. I need John Stewart back sooooo fucking badly. But I know you can say something to chase this away. It’s a lucid recognition of completely explosive fuckery strapped to a psychotic bomb. Please make it stop!! Please fucking pleeease!
Don’t fight the hallucinations. Watch them not with fear, but with joy, for this election cycle is evidence that the illuminati are finally winning the great secret war against the lizard people. The mind control is weakening. Soon, we will all be awakened to the world of the real, and you won’t need to borrow a pair of Roddy Piper’s sunglasses to see it.
Prepare yourselves. Keep your wits about you. Pray that Jay-Z and Beyoncé are able to keep Blue Ivy safe long enough to fulfill the prophecy, and know that Jon Stewart is not gone, for the Jew from the East shall rise again in glory to judge the living and the dead, and his syndication shall have no end.