On unattractive insecurities.

Someone asked you “No one wants to be my boyfriend. Why?” and you said, “You’re probably not very attractive.” Ok, maybe, knowing your blog, I shouldn’t be surprised that this a rather heartless thing to say, tongue in cheek or no. Still, though, for some people, it’s really hard not to internalize that shit. I struggle every day with the fact that I can’t get anyone to stick around past a second date. Yet, at the same time, I’m told every day by friends and family members how attractive I am, and sometimes I can actually look in the mirror and genuinely believe it. And I still get lots of attention from the opposite sex, it’s just hard for me to keep it. Anyways, I guess I’m admitting that your comment really struck me hard because it’s my worst fear, but also… just, … guh. Haven’t you before said that beauty is objective, and that even weight is not a big factor when it comes to being truly attractive? What do you mean by “just not attractive”? How can you possibly legitimize that as a permanent asset (or lack thereof) for any one person? It seems unfair.

Who said any of this shit was supposed to be fair? That answer wasn’t heartless. It was fucking hilarious, and if you weren’t laughing it’s because your insecurities have a stronger influence on your personality than your sense of humor. No wonder you can’t get a third date.

Being hot isn’t the same thing as being attractive. Being ugly isn’t the same thing as being unattractive. I’d rather be comfortable in my own skin than have a flawless complexion any day of the week, and I’d rather spend time with people who get the joke than people who get their panties in a bunch.

It’s your insecurity about not being attractive that makes you unattractive, so quit looking in the mirror for validation. Quit keeping track of your number of dates. Quit being so fucking needy.

Lighten the fuck up, kiddo.


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