Dear Ms. Talk,
I was thinking about a fight to the death between you and any random Jezebel staff writer. I figure you’d win, but was wondering. What would some of your key moves be?
Does it really have to be a fight to the death?
I mean shit, if we gotta go thunderdome style I’ll be sure to bring my knives, but before we get all “two bitches enter, one bitch leaves,” can’t we just start off with a little creamed corn bikini wrestling?
It’s not that I’m afraid of a little blood, it’s just that I’ve always thought Tracie Egan was kinda hot, and I’d much rather pin her luscious body between my slippery thighs than crush her skull with an IBM Selectric in a post-apocalyptic cage match, you know?
Sex over violence, is all I’m saying. Think about the the pay-per-view revenue.
Yours in sin,