Fun-Sized Advice

On fun-sized advice

What is the cure to narcissism?

What does intimate sex look like?
Intimate sex doesn’t look. It feels.

Why is this the time of year that old flames come out of the woodwork? And why is it never the ones you want to hear from?
It’s a byproduct of break-up season. (The ones you want to hear from didn’t recently get dumped.)

Have you turned so quickly on our girl, Jennifer Lawrence?
Not yet, but I have very little patience for false humility.

How do you say no to someone who continuously asks you out and refuses to stop, even upon request?
Tell the creep to fuck off. Be rude. Be loud. Embarrass him for disrespecting you, and when he acts all butthurt and calls you a bitch, don’t feel the least bit bad about it.

Coquette! If you could speak any 5 languages fluently, which would they be and why?
English (because I live in America), Spanish (because I live in Los Angeles), Arabic (because it’s a beautiful language), Mandarin (because I feel geo-politically obligated), and French (because Paris).

What do you do when you sorely miss a jerk you broke up with a few months ago?
Personally? I rebound date wildly inappropriate men until I’m filled with self-loathing and regret. I also tend to sublimate my frustration with exercise until I’m in really good shape. Do whatever you gotta do, babe, just don’t fall back into the jerk’s orbit.

What’s the difference between pride, ego and vanity?
Pride is an internal emotion. Ego is the source of that pride, while vanity is the external projection of it.

Hey, it’s the spontaneous Vegas weekender! Just wanted you to know it turned out amazing. I had a great time, and I’m so, so fucking glad I went. Thanks, Coquette.
Fuck yeah.


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