Fun-Sized Advice

On fun-sized advice

If “the human condition is a death march of futility and decay,” which I agree with, is there any good reason for a person to have kids?
Most people tend to find purpose in their children, and there’s something to be said for perpetuating the species.

A friend of mine told me that having a Facebook account these days is like having a cellphone, it’s no longer optional. What are your thoughts on this?
Facebook is optional. A cellphone is optional. It’s all fucking optional, but hey, your friend is just being a good little consumer.

Do you ever worry about how much the lifestyle you advocate reflects the sinister message of Brave New World? I mean, the majority of your posts seem to boil down to “have some soma, you’ll be fine.”
Yep, that’s me, just another disillusioned Alpha Plus lecturer at the College of Emotional Engineering writing endless propaganda for the World State.

I got fired for missing a staff meeting today. (I’ve been working at a coffee place for 2 months). I forgot about the meeting. How can I get my job back?
You didn’t get fired for missing the staff meeting. You got fired for being the kind of person who misses staff meetings. There’s a difference, and that’s the lesson you need to take away from this.

Can you give a compelling argument why we shouldn’t abolish minimum wage?

Sure. The rich don’t need to get any richer, and the poor don’t need to get any poorer. Minimum wage plays a small role in combating obscene wealth inequality. That’s a good thing, and anyone who disagrees is an asshole.

Does Los Angeles still make you weak in the knees?
Not really, no. I still love LA, but I’m not in love anymore, you know? Sometimes I fantasize about moving to other cities. It feels like cheating.


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