Fun-Sized Advice

On fun sized advice

Dear Coquette,

What is your favorite Muppet? And why?
Animal, because he’s a drummer.


I don’t think I respect my husband anymore. Is there any way to fix this?

That’s up to him.


What’s the worst thing a person can do?

Hate.


Am I supposed to be having fun in college?

You’re supposed to be having fun in life, my dear.


What are your thoughts on assisted suicide?

I consider the right to die as absolute and inalienable as the right to live.


At what point does Republican distrust and hatred of the government and effort to dismantle and cripple it begin to resemble treason?

Treason is a crime against a nation, not a government. You mean sedition. Also, you really need to relax. 


I’m gay and my life will fall apart if anyone finds out, what should I do?

Start changing the circumstances of your life that keep you from being true to yourself.


“Pulp Fiction” or “Kill Bill?”

True Romance.


How do you become hard to get? Do you just have to be an amazing/cool person and choosy about who you date?

It’s not about being cool and choosy. It’s about knowing yourself and having high standards.


How do you forgive someone?

Let go of all your anger and resentment for them.


What do you think of the saying “youth is wasted on the young”?

I think it’s equally valid as saying wisdom is wasted on the old.


Is the belief that it’s all gonna work out (even if it doesn’t work like you planned it) hopeless optimism or smiling peace?

It’s hopeless optimism if you expect a happy ending. It’s smiling peace if you have no expectations at all.


What are your religious beliefs?

I’m not one for irrational delusions.


How do I not grow up to be a man-child?

Actually grow the hell up.

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