Fun-Sized Advice

On more fun-sized advice.

So you’ve done wedding vows. Would you be willing to do tattoos?
Fuck yeah. You know how to reach me.

My boyfriend went down on me but apparently it tasted disgusting, what should I do?
Eat healthy. Drink lots of water. Wash your fucking vagina.

Where do you fall on the Kinsey scale?
Two and three quarters.

Judy Garland or Katharine Hepburn?
Tallulah Bankhead.

What do you do when you suddenly find yourself sexually attracted to people other than your significant other?
I enjoy it while maintaining my integrity.

Hey CT, usually I agree with what you say, but I’m still not sure why you would want to wear the word cunt around your neck. Explain?
If I have to explain it to you, you couldn’t pull it off anyway.

You’ve said that prostitutes sell sex and whores sell their principles. I’m a prostitute, not a whore, and it feels wrong to sleep with a married man even though I’m turning down a lot of money. Is that incredibly naive?
It’s not naive at all. I totally respect that as a sex worker, you refuse to knowingly participate in infidelity. Ethically, you’re kind of a badass.

What is your definition of naive?
An innocent lack of sophistication.

Whats the difference between a hooker and a porn star?
A camera.


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