Fun-Sized Advice

On more fun sized advice

Would you really do Make-A-Wish? I actually qualify for a Wish and think it would be cool to meet you.
Shit, I’m not gonna say no to a terminally ill teenager. You’d have to be able to keep a secret, though.

How can I deal with rejection better?
Never take it personally.

We are becoming a nation of idiots. do you agree?
Herpity derp derp? Durr hurr.

Walk us through your writing process, dearest coke talk.
Sit down. Hit play on iTunes. Start typing.

Oh noes mini roommate crush. Helpp.
Quit talking like that.

Didn’t get the job.
Keep going.

How do you make a comedown go as smoothly as possible, without taking anything extra like diazepam?
Healthy food and a shower.

Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. True or false?
True as fuck.

are you an organ donor?
Hell yes I am, and every last one of you motherfuckers should be too.

Do you kiss him right after he has gone down on you?
Why wouldn’t I? My pussy is delicious.

How do you facilitate a threesome in High School?
Shut up and do your homework.


2 thoughts on “On more fun sized advice

  1. O says:

    The first question, I’ve always wondered, did you get to meet that terminally-ill teenager who wrote in who qualified for a wish?

    • aMalignantBitch says:

      This is years after you asked so it’ll probably go unread, but I was the “terminally ill” teen. I was never terminally ill but I did have a fuckton of cancer – I’m better now. We never met. By the time I saw her answer, Make-A-Wish was already moving forward with a Wish that had seemed more doable to me and I didn’t have a chance to change it. No regrets, though. Hard to worry about what-might-have-been when “dead from cancer” is just as much a realistic hypothetical as “met the smartest bitch on Tumblr.”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *