Fun-Sized Advice

On more fun-sized advice

What is special about Wednesdays?
On Wednesdays we wear pink.

What are reasonable guidelines to dating a friend’s ex?

What are your thoughts on cuddle parties?

How do you set boundaries with a mother who believes that any boundary whatsoever is a slight and becomes abusive and reactionary as a response?

How does one go about ensuring that the people they drag home for a little no-strings don’t talk too much?
Duct tape.

Why don’t I know what to do? Strike that, why do all paths seem to lead nowhere?
Because nothing matters.

What’s the quickest way to stop acting like a lovesick puppy?
You’re on a drug. You gotta let that shit wear off naturally.

What about Lena Dunham do you hate?
I don’t hate Lena Dunham. She’s just an easy punch line.

What’s the problem with The Newsroom?
It hasn’t earned the right to be so smug.

The people whose questions get answered must feel so privileged.
How does it feel?

I lost a bunch of weight and now I look like an American Apparel model. What now?
I dunno, buy a unitard and practice your bitch-face.


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