Best-Of Advice

On revenge

What’s your take on revenge? I have so many stories to offer I won’t even pick one, but just hope you’ll tell me how you’ve dealt with scratching that itch to get back at someone, for whatever reason.

Revenge is like driving drunk: it’s always a bad idea, you have to be extra careful when you’re doing it, and if you get caught it’ll never have been worth it.

Also, if you happen to pull it off, it’s not something you should ever brag about.

With that in mind, let me just say that hypothetically, if you were never a sleazy, bigoted dickbag of a backwoods cop who abused his authority and fucked with the wrong girl, then you probably wouldn’t have had a constant stream of gay porn subscriptions paid in your name via money order that were mailed to both your home address and in care of your commanding officer at work.

Just sayin’, hypothetically.

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