On why the hell not

I used to think “hey, you’re a grown up; I’m a grown up, we both want to, why the hell not”. Which is totally fine for one night stands but somehow undermines longer relationships. I’m starting a new one with someone who I actually went out on a date with first off and I don’t want to fuck it up just yet. How novel.

So, straight up, what’s your timeline of action for pretending to be a respectable young woman?

I don’t pretend to be respectable. I am respectable.

More importantly, I respect myself. I’m not saying you don’t, but your problem is that you’re asking “why the hell not?” when you should be simply asking “why?”

You’re both grown ups, you both want to, so why should you fuck?

Do you see the difference? One question cheapens the sex, the other gives it importance.

Also, don’t be afraid to literally ask it. Acknowledge that you love to fuck, and acknowledge that you would love to fuck him. Discuss it openly. Turn it into foreplay.

Once you’ve answered that question, it doesn’t matter whether it’s the first date or the fifth.


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