Probably not the best idea to be a fuck buddy with an ex with whom you still have feelings for right?
Good, earth shaking, familiar sex at the sake of playing emotional Russian roulette…
Sounds shaky to me, but pretty damn irresistible at the same time.
What do you think?
He’s not a fuck buddy. He’s an ex. He’ll never be a fuck buddy. You’re having good old fashioned ex sex, which can be damn good if you’re careful.
Still, fuck at your own risk. There is no lifeguard at that hot tub.
I’m a bitch. More like a brat to be honest. I’m pretty sure my family has a history of being bi-polar (especially my mother) but it has never been diagnosed or treated. I think I inherited it. I’m just mean. I can’t put it any other way. I’m fucking selfish, spoiled and disinterested. I always easily make friends who really care about me and then, without realizing what I’m doing, I make them start hating me by treating them like shit. It’s just a matter of time. I’ve been doing this all my life. And I rarely feel bad about it if ever. I just don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me.
If it helps, I am the youngest of the family. I’ve always been the baby, catered to and all that shit. Maybe that’s why I’m so self-centered. And I know without a doubt that I got part of my attitude from my parents and older sisters. We’re a family comprised entirely of arrogant assholes, liars and cheaters and I’m not exaggerating. The sad thing is, I think I’m the worst out of all of them. But I realized this a long fucking time ago. I just don’t know how to change myself. I don’t know how to reconnect with people I’ve pushed away. I don’t know how to be nice and even when I fake it it doesn’t last very long. I’m sorry, I don’t know what the fuck kind of advice I’m asking for here. I just wanted to tell someone and I respect your opinion.
You’re not bi-polar. You’re a budding sociopath with a little malignant narcissism thrown in for good measure.
It’s probably better that you didn’t ask for advice, because there is none. You’re fucked.
Sucks to be you.
I’ve been in a whole two relationships before in my life, so I am aware that I am no expert and completely inexperienced. If I wasn’t I wouldn’t be wasting your time. So a little background info as short as I can make for you: First relationship- deadbeat boyfriend that ended up moving into my house because he was poor, pathetic, and quite possibly was just that crazy and controlling that he felt the need to be able to keep an eye on me 100% of the time. Mind you I’m only 20 years old and I was living with my parents during this. The living with me part only lasted a month, he drove me crazy and I had to force him to get his life together. He was mean and verbally abusive (and I’m not just being some whiney cunt, I was just a young and stupid girl and fell for his lies and bull shit and he belittled me and somehow got control over me, something that will never happen again.) Second relationship: sex. typical girl meets boy, gets fucked, falls for said boy and boy gets other girlfriend. again, and again, and again. So now, 6 months into relationship number 3, I’m looking for some harsh words of encouragement not fuck it up. Hes fantastic, sarcastic, cute at all the right times and just enough ass hole in him so hes not that nice guy that everyone always talks about wanting but doesnt ever appreciate when they get. The only problems we have are when we have sex because im inexperienced (I’ve slept around a little but I dont whore myself out to any guy with a big dick and a nice smile) and insecure. Its a weird situation though, I’m insecure because often we will have sex and neither one of us will come because I cant handle his dick without eventually being in a lot of pain and he is on some obnoxious mission to make me come. This shouldnt be obnoxious, but he should just realize that after awhile when im in pain shit just aint gonna happen. So, sorry for the ramble but heres the point. I need to hear it from someone whose gonna give it to me harsh and let me know how things really are. I dont want to feel insecure, but the fact is no matter how many times he tells me if i wont come theres no reason he should, i still feel like a pathetic ass hole when i cant do it for him. we have been screwing for months and pretty much have been doing it the same way until this week when we had sex in two different positions other then the 3 or 4 weve been doing the whole time. i cant get past the pain and have come to tears almost multiple times just trying to grin and bear it so he could get off. and keep in mind that this isnt some wham bam thank you maam kinda shit. the sex has never lasted under 15 minutes and is on average a lot longer then that. after 20 minutes of it it hurts so bad, and its a depth thing not a friction thing, because its never a problem of not getting wet. so, take from that what you may, and tell me something that can help if you will. I dont want my insecurities to fuck this up.
There are a couple of things going on here that need to change.
First, you need to recognize that he is just as inexperienced as you. Like every boy born after 1985 he learned to fuck by watching porn, and that leads to the kind of endless, detached meat pistoning that you describe here.
It’s bad sex, compounded by the fact that he’s got a big dick. Big dicked guys should know better. They don’t get to go balls deep. Bruising your cervix is not cool. You should not be letting him pound your uterus. Since he doesn’t seem to get it, you just have to tell him — not so fucking deep!
Next, you two need to quit feeling responsible for each other’s orgasms. This is the most important trick to good sex. Neither of you should ever be “on some obnoxious mission” to make the other cum.
He thinks he’s being chivalrous when he says stupid shit like, “if you won’t cum, there’s no reason I should.” Call him out. It’s not gentlemanly. It’s passive-aggressive and childish.
You have to sit him down and tell him. Tell him. Make sure he understands. He is responsible for his orgasm. You are responsible for your orgasm. Most importantly, neither of you is obligated to have an orgasm.
I have a feeling that sports metaphors will work for him, so tell him that sex is not a sport with a half-time and a scoreboard. There are no points. There is no goal. No one is keeping track of statistics.
Sex can last five minutes or five hours. You can each have multiple orgasms or none at all. It doesn’t matter.
I promise, once he stops competitive porno fucking, your love life will improve instantly.
I go to a fairly small extremely liberal college and am in a serious relationship. My boyfriend and I want to have a threesome with another woman. The only problem is that I, being fairly quiet but not shy, have no idea how to make this happen, and happen in a way that won’t be exceptionally awkward for the rest of my time at this tiny school. My boyfriend would do the choosing and the talking, but I think that it’s important for me to feel comfortable with the woman before we have sex, and talking about it beforehand is a big part of that.
Suggestions?
Your boyfriend can do the talking, but don’t kid yourself — you’re the one who’ll do the choosing. Don’t shy away from that responsibility. This is all about what you want.
Be smart about this. Don’t pick a co-ed from your tiny school. Don’t have dorm room threesomes. Keep the wild shit separate from your day-to-day life or things will get awkward and embarrassing.
I don’t know if there are any lifestyle parties in your area, but consider going to one of those. If you don’t know where to begin looking, I recommend joining lifestylelounge.com. (It’s the only swinger site out there that’s real.)
Regardless of where you end up finding your threesome buddy, you should have a plan that includes a hotel room and plenty of get-to-know-each-other time.
Also, you and your boyfriend need to work out all the rules, boundaries, and code words ahead of time.
Happy fucking!
I was in the top 15% of my highschool class. Now I’m in my 5th semester of college in NYC, have a mere 27 credits, and haven’t been to class since I turned 21. I’m constantly wallowing in existential angst, terribly unmotivated to grow up and get a normal job, and an inch too short to be a model. I’m thinking of just becoming a secretary, dressing provocatively then suing my boss for sexual harassment. Or maybe just becoming a house-wife. [fuck feminism, give me an allowance and a list of shit to get done before you get home…I get shallow marriage proposals every time I go out] Or maybe I’ll join the peace corps. What say you Dear Coke Talk?
best,
shallow, and self-depricating
Yeah, life sucks when you’re beautiful in the big city.
You deserve an ass kicking — not just for being a shallow cunt, but also for completely missing the point. Fuck feminism? You don’t even know what the word means.
Screw the peace corps. Go enlist in the army.
Also, don’t ever brag about being in the top 15%.
Ok here goes, I cheat on my wife with random hook ups with men. I usually just get blown. I fucked a guy twice. I just do it for the release since I get nothing at home.
Your thoughts?
Listen up, Congressman. Stop cheating on your wife with anonymous dudes. It’s super creepy.
If you’re trapped in a loveless marriage, get the fuck out — in this case even if you have kids. You’ll do more psychological damage to your offspring as a self-hating closeted homosexual than you will as an openly gay divorcee.
Also, stop voting Republican.
I can’t tell if I’m his therapist, or his girlfriend. What do I do?
Do you have kids together? Are you in love? No? Break up with him. Life is too short. Go find someone remarkable.
When I get home from school and change my clothes, I often find blobs of white goo on my inner thighs. What’s wrong with me?
Um, this really depends on whether you’re a guy or a girl.
I am 22 and a girl and I would like to find an older gentleman who could help out with the bills. How do I go about that?
Sign up at seekingarrangement.com. Treat it like any other job.
I’m in love with my best friend and I have been for about a year or so. Problem is, he’s had a girlfriend for about four months now. I respect that, and it’s not like I’m not gonna move in on that. But I need to get over him somehow, and the easiest way is to find another guy.
Well, this should be all fine and dandy, because at 16, I’m bored, single, and almost able to drive (by almost I mean six more months). The problem is, apparently all high school boys expect girls to be easy. I’m not easy, hence, this isn’t fucking easy for me.
Should I just completely lower my standards and bone jump the next guy who gives me a pretty smile, and maybe have some fun? I mean, I just don’t know how I’d get over him otherwise.
The easiest way to get over your feelings isn’t to fuck another guy. Bone jumping the next boy who gives you a pretty smile might work in the anonymity of a Hollywood club, but in a high school setting that’s actually pretty messy.
All high school boys want to fuck, but that doesn’t mean they expect girls to be easy. They wish girls were easy, but there’s a huge difference between wishing and expecting.
With that in mind, don’t lower your standards. I’m all about having fun, but never at the expense of my dignity. You’re logic is flawed here, in that you don’t have to be easy to be desired. You can be a righteous whore without ever compromising your morals.
Take a hot minute and pick an available boy that you might enjoy. Go have some fun with him. Feel free to do whatever you want, but make sure it’s what you want.
You’re the one with the teenage pussy. Don’t ever forget that. Don’t ever let the balance of power shift.
Just go enjoy yourself.